Sometimes a major change or formative event in your life can drastically change the landscape of your soul and inner life. Things that used to be are no more. You find that you are not what you once were but not yet what you are to become. Even in that formless and unsure gestational identity time, navigation from another realm can whisper the truth of who you are to your wondering heart. What happens then may be unprecedented as you watch what seemed dark and void erupt into a surprise discovery and overwhelming outpouring of praise!
“The voice of the Lord makes the deer give birth, and strips the forest bare; And in His temple everyone says, ‘Glory!’ ” (Psalm 29:1-11)
And the forests within me have been stripped bare.
Thick, lush life as I have known, is hidden.
But within my frame, carried about by my bones
is his temple, where He is pleased to dwell.
And inside that temple, all wait on tiptoe, straining…
Anticipating something never before in existence
to emerge.
And from a deep place, a sound is heard, rising up
bringing illumination in its train.
Everyone begins to whisper “glory…” and movement escalates,
accelerating.
My heart says, “glory!” My brain says “glory!” My bones say “glory!”
Every joint, great and small says, “glory!”
Blood vessels, vital organs, systems, muscles,
tendons, blood, lymph, … all say “glory!”
And my soul joins in to what it is hearing
resounding throughout the temple,
while my spirit, mixed with His
in a satisfied, eternal knowing,
ever so slowly, with deeply etched ancient face creases,
smiles.
This was penned by the author following a major surgery season in her life where introspection of soul was experienced. Perceived inner scatteredness and brokenness led to breakthrough when God’s Spirit came gently into her personal space in a very unprecedented way. Significant change happened. This was one of the first times she wrote, unhindered, in her time of recovery.
If my Dad were here on earth today, he would be turning 93 years old. Fact is, he is now one of two fathers I have in Heaven. Because of him, my heart has been fully persuaded that both he and my heavenly father absolutely adore me. It is not because he never made a mistake or lost his temper with me. He trusted a perfect father to cover him in his parenting of me and to fill in the gaps. That amazing love has covered a multitude of shortfalls and continues to ground my life. I miss you Dad. I love you forever. Your fathering lives on through my mothering of many. Happy Birthday.
So today is my Daddy’s birthday. It comes two days after my own. He told me more than once that throughout his life he had always wanted a daughter. During my mother’s pregnancy with me he told everyone he knew that he was sure the baby was a girl. When I arrived in the early morning hours two days before his own celebration, he felt he had received the best gift ever. Now that will make a daughter feel special indeed. It will also do wonders for her in approaching her heavenly Papa.
Maybe that is why this year I heard something extraordinary as I lay in bed in late evening, falling asleep on my birthday’s eve. Tender thoughts and impressions were being spoken and reaching out to me on the inside. “You know how expectant parents have hopes and dreams for their children? I always had dreams and hopes for you before I ever created you. The dreams were about you and for you, a very wide array of them. While I was creating you, the dreams were there with you. My joy is in watching you, living in/with you and seeing my dreams for you fulfilled.”
I was made aware that sixty-eight years ago when I was birthed, purposes, plans and dreams were set into motion in me and for me and on my behalf. I could sense their movement and continuing power in my life. It made me want to continue my life’s journey with new vigor, inspiration and renewed purpose. I felt like I was carrying a kind of torch or baton for my generation’s leg of the life relay. My earthly Dad handed it to me at his heavenly homegoing so that I could run into my heavenly Papa’s arms at the end of my own earthly trek.I was very aware those thoughts and feelings did not originate from me and I am forever changed by them.
So, dear Dad, I love you forever. I miss you every day but your birthday is a significant day of inspiration for me. You make me want to finish strong. You make me want to be fearless and excellent in every way. Most of all, you paved the way for me to know the adoration of my heavenly Daddy, my Abba. I may have been your birthday gift, but that is the greatest gift you ever gave me.
At Christmas time, the most humble and overlooked places can share in the wonder of this supernatural time. It was during such a lowly encounter as this, I tried to capture and preserve in writing a few illuminated moments so as to never forget.Perhaps I was tapping in to the sense of that very first Christmas…
